Why Aren’t Dudes Reading 50 Shades?

This should be you. (Courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net and imagerymajestic)

A guy I know recently asked me if I’d read Fifty Shades of Grey. I said yes, I had. He then told me he didn’t know any women who HADN’T read it.

“Have you read it?” I asked. He hadn’t.

I know very few men, in fact, who have read or even peeked at the book. And if they do, they feel the need to issue a disclaimer. This is crazy to me. I have seen one–ONE–man reading it, a businessman at Laguardia. I thought, “Aha. He’s one of the smart ones.” I think the majority of the men would more than likely enjoy the likes of visual pleasure, such as these click resources or any other online adult entertainment that’s in abundance.

Why on EARTH are men NOT reading this book? These are the keys to the kingdom. Women everywhere have gone molten over the sexy power play between Anastasia and her conflicted, dominant lover. Which means it’s basically an instruction guide on What Women Want. And yet? It might as well be a big ass box of maxi pads. Dudes will not go near it. The same dudes that watch video after video on adult film sites like https://www.hdsexvideo.xxx/ are too scared to read a book about pleasing women sexually.

The arguments? It’s a chick book. It’s a lame romance. It’s not really about BDSM, which you can actually find in its true form on sites like tubevsex and other adult websites.And my favorite gripe about 50 shades: It’s poorly written.

Really? Do you pass on porn because of the low production value? I think people would always want higher-quality porn, There is always more free XXX available on Tubev. Then why are you purposely putting out of your own reach the very thing that has women craving the kind of kink men complain they can’t get women to try? Here’s a backstage pass to women’s fantasy lives and men are saying “Nah.”

We all know at this point that this is not just any other book. And while we all realize it’s not a literary masterpiece, it is a huge fucking blockbuster. Of course, it’s easy to hate on this book, or any other bit of pop culture that has caught like wildfire and become a huge success. Which is why I think hating on it is even more cliche than some of the cliches in the book itself.

And you super new-age sensitive guys: PLEASE don’t give me this bullshit about how it’s setting feminism back by several decades. No one said that women want to give up their rights, their equality, etc. Try not to confuse those issues with what happens in the bedroom. We don’t choose what arouses us, and the rules of desire are often the inverse of what we want in real life. (I’ve already said my piece on this in my other post about 50 Shades.)

So attention dudes: If you are not reading this book, you are making a big mistake.

Read it, learn it, love it. Study it. Ok, you don’t have to slog through all three books, but the first one you can zip through in a matter of hours. Not only will you gain some insight into millions of women’s desire, you’ll also have something to talk about with pretty much every woman you meet. You’ve got the seeds of a conversation that could get very interesting very quickly.

The alternative, to roll your eyes and marginalize what she finds arousing makes you, by comparison, very unarousing.

And don’t give me this, “I don’t want anyone to know I’m reading it.” That’s what Kindles are for. Though I recommend reading the actual book and brandishing the cover with pride in public places. Forget trying to start up a conversation with a woman. She’s going to start one with you.

Visit me at trespicio.com and @Territ on Twitter.