You’re sitting at a bar when you look over and see this couple. Or should I say THAT couple. You can’t miss them. Their roaming hands and mouths and sultry stares. Their dinners untouched as they practically consume each other whole. You feel disgusted. Offended. Mad, even. You think, How vile! How vulgar! Get a room, […]

If you’re weeping into a glass of sherry and wondering why the world is so cruel and your life is so loveless, well, you have no one to blame but yourself. Yes, I said that. Because if you’re like a lot of women, you wait. And wait. You think you’re enlightened and independent, yet there […]

Ah, shit. I wasn’t going to blog about The Bachelor. And while I hardly hold it up as the shining and global example of all romantic relationships, it’s a pressure cooker wherein all cliches rise to the surface quickly, so let’s pluck a few out and look at them. This week’s lesson: Bitchy and guarded […]

Online dating is revolutionizing all relationships — whether you’re dating or not. For most of recorded history women did not have romantic options. You married the dude who your family deemed appropriate, and he likely lived within a quarter mile, and you stayed with him for life, like or not.  When I interviewed Dan Slater, author […]

Sure, you could spend the night watching Love, Actually and then sob into some leftover Shiraz. Or, you could actually do something fun and maybe even sexy. No, it does not qualify as even the lowest level crisis that you’re not perfectly matched with an ideal mate just because it’s Saturday. You’re single now, but you likely […]

You’ve got lots of reasons why you’re not dating or meeting anyone new. And they all begin with the assumptions you make about yourself, other people, and the future. All of which are incorrect. Here are the three things you’re sure you’re right about, that you’re not: 1. You assume something’s wrong with you. There’s actually […]

Meeting new friends isn’t all that different from dating: You meet, and some kind of magic happens. You’re drawn to each other, attracted even. Not in a creepy way. But in a very real way. You want to see her, hang out, get to know her. You want her in your life. It’s not unlike […]

Hobbies are for losers. I say this because the people who are in it to win it, to do something real, something big, something life changing, don’t call it a hobby; they call it their life. Of course our lives consist of things that we do for fun, relaxation, things that don’t feel like work. […]

#TBT: Vanity Strikes: I Buy My First Lipstick

January 3, 1987 Today, mom and me went to the mall. We both got the same lipstick at the Clinique counter! "Mauve Crystal" or something. It's so neat! But I hated to put it on my cruddy face. Yeah, it looks nice from afar, but it was…

"I Shouldn't Be Here": Feeling Unqualified for Your Own Life

I have felt unqualified for my own life for as long as I can remember. On the first day of kindergarten I gave a fake name. I was sure that someone named Madeline would be taken more seriously. I have been writing poetry since I was 7,…

#TBT: "I'll Never Have a Boyfriend!" (April 1987)

I wish I could tell the 12-year-old me in this picture not to worry so much. That once she gets her braces off and figures out what to do with her hair, things will come together. What follows is unedited, unfiltered self-loathing.  April…

#TBT: "Sex Before Marriage? Not Me" (January 1987)

So, this is my new tribute to #TBT: Journal entries from yesteryear, carefully hand selected and edited only for length--everything else is as it was written then. Names have been changed and will be from here on in. In this episode, the…

Why You Owe Joan Rivers More Than You Think

I owe Joan Rivers a debt of gratitude. And if you're in possession of a vagina, you owe her one, too. Because she's done more for women—not just women in comedy, but women in general—than most will realize, or even care to admit. Maybe…

A nice entry

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